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Author Topic:   The 2000 Federal Census for Rednecks
Raider
Pilot
posted 04-12- 10:00 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Raider   Click Here to Email Raider     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
The 2000 Federal Census for Rednecks

Last name: ________________

First name: (Check appropriate box)
(_) Billy-Bob
(_) Billy-Joe
(_) Billy-Ray
(_) Billy-Sue
(_) Billy-Mae
(_) Billy-Jack

What does everyone call you?
(_) Booger
(_) Bubba
(_) Junior
(_) Sissy
(_) Other___________________

Age: ____ (if unsure, guess)

Sex: ____ M _____ F _____ Not sure

Shoe Size: ____ Left ____ Right

Occupation: (Check appropriate box)
(_) Farmer
(_) Mechanic
(_) Hair Dresser
(_) Unemployed
(_) Dirty Politician
(_) Preacher

Spouse's
Name:_________________________

2nd Spouse's
Name:______________________

3rd Spouse's
Name:______________________

Lover's
Name:___________________________

Relationship with spouse: (Check appropriate box)
(_) Sister
(_) Brother
(_) Aunt
(_) Uncle
(_) Cousin
(_) Mother
(_) Father
(_) Son
(_) Daughter
(_) Pet

Number of children living in household: _____

Number of children living in shed: ______

Number that are yours: ______

Mother's Name: _______________________(If not sure, leave blank)

Father's Name: _______________________(If not sure, leave blank)

Education: 1 2 3 4 (Circle highest grade completed)

Do you (_) own or (_) rent your mobile home? (Check appropriate box)

Total number of vehicles you own: ___
Number of vehicles that still crank: ___
Number of vehicles in front yard: ___
Number of vehicles in back yard: ___
Number of vehicles on cement blocks: ___

Firearms you own and where you keep them:
____ truck
____ bedroom
____ bathroom
____ kitchen
____ shed

Model and year of your pickup: 196_

Do you have a gun rack?
(_) Yes (_) No; If no, please explain:

Newspapers/magazines you subscribe to:
(_) The National Enquirer
(_) The Globe
(_) TV Guide
(_) Soap Opera Digest
(_) Rifle and Shotgun

Number of times you've seen a UFO:_____

Number of times in the last 5 years you've seen Elvis:_____

Number of times you've seen Elvis in a UFO:_____

How often do you bathe:
(_) Weekly
(_) Monthly
(_) Not Applicable


Color of eyes: Left______ Right_____

Color of hair:
(_) Blond
(_) Black
(_) Red
(_) Brown
(_) White
(_) Clairol

Color of teeth:
(_) Yellow
(_) Brownish-Yellow
(_) Brown
(_) Black
(_) N/A

Brand of chewing tobacco you prefer:
(_)Red-Man

How far is your home from a paved road?
(_) 1 mile
(_) 2 miles
(_) just a whoop-and-a-holler
(_) road?

How many times have you described on national T.V.
what the Tornado sounded like???

------------------
Raider 33rd~GS
Raiders Site

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Jerry
Pilot
posted 04-12- 11:10 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Jerry   Click Here to Email Jerry     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
ROFLMAO!!!!

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Himdog
Pilot
posted 04-20- 12:36 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Himdog   Click Here to Email Himdog     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Hey, thats not cool to make fun of North Carolina's Census Now you know why NC has the lowest return of the Federal Census, because Billy-Bob told us that the "Man" will come get us all if we sent it in hehe.
Himdog out

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Jerry
Pilot
posted 04-20- 01:50 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Jerry   Click Here to Email Jerry     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
A good friend of mine who I work with is from North Carolina. I emailed this survey to him. He threatened to sue me until I reminded him that Redneck is not a "protected class". hehe

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Raider
Pilot
posted 04-20- 09:47 PM     Click Here to See the Profile for Raider   Click Here to Email Raider     Edit/Delete Message   Reply w/Quote
Don't laugh, this is what I filled out and mailed back in.

I sure hope I win somthin good.

------------------
Raider 33rd~GS
Raiders Site

[This message has been edited by Raider (edited 04-20-2000).]

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