posted 02-24- 12:13 PM               

>> > > Yo Momma's So Fat....
>> > > >
>> > > > ..when she dances she makes the band skip.
>> > > >
>> > > > ...when she was diagnosed with the flesh eating disease,
>> > > > the doctor gave her 13 years to live.
>> > > >
>> > > > ...she puts mayonnaise on aspirin.
>> > > >
>> > > > ....her ass has its own congressman.
>> > > >
>> > > > ....her cereal bowl came with a lifeguard.
>> > > >
>> > > > ....when she goes to the zoo, the elephants throw HER
>> > > > peanuts.
>> > > >
>> > > > ....her high school graduation picture was an aerial
>> > > > photograph.
>> > > >
>> > > > ...her driver's license says "Picture continued on other
>> > > > side."
>> > > >
>> > > > ....the back of her neck looks like a pack of hot dogs.
>> > > >
>> > > > ....all the restaurants in town have signs that say
>> > > > "Maximum Occupancy: 240 Patrons OR Yo Mama".
>> > > >
>> > > > ....when she ran away, they had to use all four sides of
>> > > > the milk carton.
>> > > >
>> > > > ....when she gets in an elevator, it HAS to go down.
>> > > >
>> > > > ....she was born with a silver shovel in her mouth.
>> > > >
>> > > > ....she's got smaller fat women orbiting around her.
>> > > >
>> > > > ....I had to take a train and two buses just to get on
>> > > > her good side.
>> > > >
>> > > > ....they had to grease a door frame and hold a Twinkie on
>> > > > the otherside to get her through.
>> > > >
>> > > > . ....her nickname is "DAAAMN!!"
>> > > >
>> > > > .....she has to iron her pants on the driveway.
>> > > >
>> > > > ....she's on BOTH sides of the family.
>> > > >
>> > > > ....when I yell "Kool-Aid," she comes crashing through
>> > > > the wall.
>> > > >
>> > > > ....she could sell shade.
>> > > >
>> > > > ....when she crosses the street, cars look out for HER.
>> > > >
>> > > > ....people jog around her for exercise.
>> > > >
>> > > > ....she gets runs in her jeans.
>> > > >
>> > > > ....her blood type is Ragu.
>> > > >
>> > > > ....when she goes to a restaurant, she doesn't get a
>> > > > menu, she gets an estimate.
>> > > >
>> > > > ....if she got her shoes shined, she'd have to take his
>> > > > word for it!
>> > > >
>> > > > ....she has to put her belt on with a boomerang.
>> > > >
>> > > > ....when she turns around, people throw her a welcome
>> > > > back party.
>> > > >
>> > > > ....she can't even jump to a conclusion.
>> > > >
>> > > > ....she went to the movies and sat next to everyone.
>> > > >
>> > > > ....her belly button doesn't have lint, it has sweaters.
>> > > >
>> > > > ....she was walking down the street, I swerved to miss
>> > > > her, and ran out of gas